I do, on occasion, get asked by people why I don’t keep up my blog more (aside, of course, from the nagging voices in my head pressuring me about it). Well, like 98% of the questions I ever get asked, I have a simple answer and a more complex one. Typically, however, both tend to have some root in excuses and avoidance (so if you ever ask me a question, do expect that the first answer I give to anything probably isn’t the best one – I assure you that I am a person best not taken at face value, but rather given the benefit of the doubt for having something much more valuable beneath the surface).
So, the short answer is, I haven’t had the time to do most anything I want to lately, and keeping up with my blog falls into that category. I’ve been neglecting a lot of things this past year or so, and instead of dealing with the burdens that overwhelm me by finding an outlet or channel to deal with them, I’ve been avoiding them.
The longer answer is, I’m already so shielded and guarded, it seems so redundant to create yet another mechanism to project my facade on. I can easily and readily write about things on a superficial level; things that won’t give you any glimpses into who I am, how I feel, the way I think, the things I want, but will profess to offer an opinion or insight into something. And at some point, that’s what I’ll do. Hope you like it. I may claim that the things I say hold some significance or personal insight, but the fact is I’ve been writing my entire life, and I’ve never been able to expose myself through words that any/everyone could see. I always reserve a part of me, through fallacy or omission. Expressing my true feelings, having that vulnerability, is something that is special, and is reserved for someone who is as well.